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Talking Dictionary 635. Cops That Just Say No

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635. An off‐duty NYPD officer crashed into a parked car late Sunday night. He was charged with drunk driving. He was the fourth officer in four months so charged. Police Commissioner Ratten said, "Drinking and driving is stupid. This has got to stop. Officers should be model citizens. As commissioner, I'm fixing this problem once and for all. Starting Monday, NYPD will hire teetotalers only. Next month, all officers who are problem drinkers will enter rehab. If they don't successfully complete the program, I'll ask them to resign. If they don't resign, I'll fire them. Next year, all officers who drink, but aren't problem drinkers, will have to attend Alcoholics Anonymous meetings weekly. That way, they won't become problem drinkers." A reporter said, "Sir, what about the hazards of tobacco? Are you going to allow NYPD officers to continue smoking?" Ratten said, "Of course. Cigarettes don't make you do anything stupid." 6.0

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