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"We must spend less money on pools this summer," the mayor said. The city won't open four of 20 pools. It will shorten the swim season by two weeks. It will shorten daily pool hours. It will close pools on Mondays and Tuesdays. It will reduce the number of lifeguards. It will reduce the amount of water in the pools by 50 percent. "Everyone knows that a half-full pool is better than an empty pool," said the mayor. It will remove all of the diving boards. "That way nobody will get hurt diving into a half-full pool," said the mayor. It will shorten the bathroom hours. Pools will be open from 11 to 6. Bathrooms will be open from 12 to 4. "People will have to 'hold it' when the bathrooms are closed," said the mayor. "Nobody better pee in the pool. Our lifeguards wear sunglasses that detect yellow water."
Copyright © 2011-2013 Mike Carlson. All rights reserved.